Time to move on and look at another blog if you are not interested in reading a story. I try not to get personal, i mean real personal things out on this blog. But tonight, it's the eve of the 11th anniversary of the worst day I could ever remember. Everyone you talk to has a story. That includes me.
I sleep with the TV. I know, but I like the noise. My dad sleeps with the radio on so I think that's where i get it. When I fall asleep, my husband usually turns it to the western channel and about 4am I turn it back to news. We are super lucky in that we have east coast feed. That means we get the news at the same time as they do in New York. So, I remember the Today Show in the background and I figured it was time to get moving and start waking up. The next thing I knew, Brian Williams came on and they were talking about a fire in the World Trade Center. And it all went to hell from there. I remember taking my kids to school and wondering why is there school today. I remember calling Scholastic to try and reach my publisher Cara who was working on my next book and the phone just went dead. I didn't know anyone else in New York. Just Cara.... and it took days to finally get through and know that she was ok.
It was horrific. I came home after taking the kids to school and crawled back into bed and couldn't take my eyes off of the TV all day. I am a bit of an ambulance chaser. But believe me... this was no car crash. This was like nothing any of us had ever seen. I just remember crying and holding my husband and crying... horrible.
All I really remember from that day was that it was the end of my career. I traveled every week. Thursday thru Sunday. To some other city, some scrapbook convention or to teach a class or be on some show. This day was no different. I was suppose to leave the next day to go on QVC to sell pens. That's what i did. Sell pens. Seems so ridiculous with what those people were going through and some never coming out of, right? Just stupid. Anyway, It was an all day scrapbooking show and I was being hired by a new company to sell their pens. American Crafts. I loved this company. All their products were made in America and it was owned by a dad and all his sons.
I remember all day long packing and unpacking and crying and not knowing what to do. Then i finally called them. Jeff Mitchell. I remember him being so calm. I had to tell him I wasn't flying. Not that day or ever again. I think he thought I was insane. None of us really knew what was happening. QVC went dark that day. They never go off the air. But they did this day. I think they went back on the air the next day. And the show went on without me. Lisa Bearnson - my friend, went on and sold the pens. And she did a hell of a job.
I never was asked to be on QVC again. Never finished the book for Scholastic ( my friend Cara quit working for them - never went back). Quit traveling Thursday thru Sunday and pretty much quit the buisness all together. BAM! Just like that. I neglected my family for 6 years and for what. A paycheck? It was a good paycheck... really good. But there are things that are more important.
I think about that every year. I think everyone has a story to tell about that day. And to this day, when I tell it I think to myself - how petty. My story is so trivial compared to what happened to all those people that lost their lives. So sad. Never forget all that. Never.
A friend told me today that I am where I am suppose to be now. I think she is right. I get to be with my kids alot now. I have been very close to home for 11 years now. I travel by vintage trailer for pete sake. I am broke, have a fun job at a craft store and pretty much am a much happier person than i was then. Everything happens for a reason. Weird..... I try not to look back. But on this day... every year, I look back and say Thank You God, for unanswered prayers ( that's a Garth Brooks song, thanks Garth). It's true. Sometimes when you head down one path you end up on the one you were suppose to be on.